Day Thirty: Your Reflection In The Mirror

Jama,

June 2012 at Balafong’s Rhythmic Vibrations

You are the first person I see when I wake up and the last, when I go to bed. Sometimes I look at you and exclaim at the magnificence of God’s handiwork. Other times, I peer into the glass and just go with the ‘everyday no be Sunday‘ flow.  Whatever the outcome though, I always smile at you… getting a smile back, and moving on to the activities of the day. You’ve been with me all my life and today, I just want to share a few things.

You are an amazing person! Like most humans, you’ve probably been through more than your years can endure. You can be extremely emotional, but your strength awes me every day. Where you could have broken down and let the world drag you through the mud, you stood firm and never let your experiences be the main determinant of your actions. Instead of constantly wallowing in self-pity as a result of your pain, your disappointments, your failures and your shortcomings, you opted for learning and using them to avoid future repetition.Isn’t experience the best teacher, after all? When all the tears have found their way down your cheek, you put up a smile and walk out into the world.

You were brought into this world for a purpose. You probably haven’t discovered it all, but I can tell you that you are well on your way. You’ve always had big dreams and have worked hard all your life to turn them into reality. Giving up has always taken the lower step from the last option… a step you hardly ever choose. Relatively, you’ve been around for a short while and we both hope you’ll be here for much longer. However, you probably have done enough to last your stay on Earth, though nothing is never really enough. You keep striving and pay great attention to other people’s expectations of you. Your nature doesn’t allow you to disappoint and so, you usually find yourself exceeding you limits just to deliver. It may be a good thing; just like it may be very bad. I’ve watched you try to focus on your own expectations and letting the rest of the world take that,but many times you’ve faltered and gone back to aiming to please everyone.

You still have a long way to go and I truly hope you’ll take note of what I’m telling you. You are only human and are bound to make mistakes and meet failure in your activities. Always remember that perfection is for God, even when I believe that humans can take the journey towards that destination. The ultimate result might not be perfect, but it wouldn’t be a long way away either. You are responsible  for only one person’s expectations: YOURS! Family, friends, loved ones and strangers may look forward to certain things from you, but only deliver when you really can. Exceeding your limits to please everyone might have its consequences, and you most probably will face them alone. In the same way, do not expect too much from others. That way, you will be saved from the many disappointments that might lead to loss of trust and confidence. Your biggest expectations should be those from yourself, for then you’ll know exactly what you’ll get.

You have very big dreams and like me, you are more of an optimist than anything else. You grew up touching lives, while changing yours in the process. You find joy and satisfaction in serving people and changing the things you have control over. You inspire other people to be like you and even greater. Deep down, you feel you can change the world. It is great to be optimistic, but it’s even greater to balance it with being realistic. Yes, you can change the world one step at a time. You may touch only a small part of the Earth’s existence, but you should find contentment in that. Look at your goals again and make sure they are both realistic and achievable. You are not the most organised person in the world, but for once, set them out and plan carefully. You will then be clear about what to expect and how much you can achieve in a certain period. Then, my dear, you can overdose on the optimism, for success would be just a mapped-out plan away!

You are a great listener and have watched me go through countless monologues. You probably are the only one who has seen me in all my states. From the bad speeches to the great ones; the crazy moments of trying out the ‘model life’; the many dance practice sessions; the blond moments of endless preening and smiling and even the crying, you’ve seen it all. I’m confident to do all this in your presence because even when it’s very bad, you never laugh, chastise or judge me. You kick your sanity out and join me! You’ve seen and heard it all and I’m never worried, because I know you’re one of the few I can trust with my life… and it’s great to know I’ll have you till I breathe my last. I shall always come back to you, for I find solace and relief in you when the world offers none.

I am what I am; you are what you are; and when our souls meet, we both are truly one person. One entity with the same visions, dreams, temperaments, character traits, beliefs, doubts and a lot more.

You are beautiful in your own way and your smile warms hearts. You are loved and have learned to love in return. You are surrounded by few but great people in your life and you truly are blessed to have them. You are talented and it doesn’t hurt to give yourself a pat in the back sometimes. You are not perfect, but you have always loved yourself. You give respect to all and take it back when it isn’t deserved. Sometimes you are willing to take up more than you can handle, but it is all in your nature to always offer help to those who need it.

I wouldn’t usually talk about your physical being, but isn’t that what I really see when I look into the mirror? You grew up having to deal with taunting and nicknames as a result of your size. Sometimes, it got to you in a bad way. Growing up, you’ve accepted that as the person you are and flaunt it proudly. You’ve used it to your advantage and have had people change their tones from ‘oh no’ to ‘wow’! My slim, tall, dark Wolof girl with the great smile and the naturally sculpted physique,you have every reason to love the woman you have become. You may still go on wishing for bigger hips (lol), for a girl is allowed an obsession or two. However, you are awesome the way you are and I wouldn’t have you any other way.

I shall see you again tonight and we shall smile at each other. Our bond is deep and will last as long as our lives. Remember all I’ve said and take this journey with me. We are destined for great things and God is on our side!

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2 thoughts on “Day Thirty: Your Reflection In The Mirror

  1. Aunty Elina

    Well done Jama for seeing it to the end. I enjoyed reading every piece and I pray that God will satisfy you with long life to see all your dreams come to reality. You are really an inspiration not just to your peers but also to people like me. Yalna Yalla laf chatt.

    Reply

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